“The Return of the King” on DVD was waiting for me from Amazon.com when I got home late last night. (I’d been at the theater with Matt — more on that later.) I popped it into my DVD player and watched the first 10 minutes or so, and then I skipped ahead to the big climax, starting with Frodo at the Cracks of Doom, and watched the final 40 (!) minutes of the film, including closing credits. The 250-minute Extended Edition will come out in the fall, but for now, it’s nice to have the whole 3-hour-20-minute theatrical release on one DVD. I was curious to see what the exact halfway point of the film was — a mere 1 hour and 40 minutes into it (known in most films as “the end”) — and it turns out it’s Frodo getting tangled up in the webs of Shelob’s lair. Creepy. I look forward to sitting down and watching the whole movie in one sitting.

Then, of course, this fall, I’ll have to buy the Extended Edition, lock myself in my apartment for the day, and watch all three extended editions back to back. That’s 208 minutes plus 223 minutes plus 250 minutes for a grand total of 681 minutes — or 11 hours and 21 minutes.

And then the paramedics will have to come and peel me off the couch.