Church of the Holy Rod

Andrew Sullivan, in discussing efforts by Christianists (by which I think he means right-wing Christians) to secure a right to express intolerance of gays, states:

[o]bjecting to hate crime laws solely when it comes to protecting gays… is bigoted on its face. Even if you argue – preposterously – that homosexual orientation is a choice, religious affiliations are also included in hate crime laws, and nothing is more of a choice, in legal terms, than faith.

Agreed. While it’s pretty clear that being gay is not a choice (we gay people are the ones who’d know, aren’t we? why don’t they trust us on this?), the issue is irrelevant when it comes to civil rights protection.

However, there are those who still don’t get it. So why not make it easier for everyone by avoiding the issue? We should just make homosexuality a religion. I don’t mean something like the MCC – I mean a brand new religion from scratch. The Church of the Holy Rod or something. Of course, that name is very phallus-oriented, so we’d need something more gender-neutral. But it’s doable.

10 thoughts on “Church of the Holy Rod

  1. When modern writers use the term “Christianist,” it’s not just right-wing, but specifically the Christian theocrats, the ones who claim America’s Founding Fathers based the Constitution on Leviticus, the ones who want the Ten Commandments posted in courtrooms, and the ones who claim that Bush “won” in 2000 even though he lost the popular vote because God wanted it that way. We say “Christianist” because “Christian” does not apply: they worship a book, not the man described by the book who, as Gary Wills wrote in his searing, red-hot zinger of an op-ed in the Times last week angrily pointed out, Jesus had no use for political systems and any attempt to co-opt the Gospel for political ends is inherently anti-Christian.

  2. boy, my first comment had some seriously fucked up grammar — my advice is don’t comment on blogs after being up late two nights in a row doing an office move unless you’ve had coffee first, which I haven’t

  3. In South Carolina practically the first thing people say to you when you are introduced is “What church do you go to?” Wouldn’t it be fun to say “Oh, I worship Cock.”

  4. Andrew Sullivan sounding intelligent – WOW! And thanks for making me laugh, homer – as in ‘Oh, I worship Cock.’ At least cock exists, whereas God ..

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