This weekend it will be 10 years since I graduated from law school.
After graduating from law school, I: studied for and passed the New York Bar Exam, moved back to New Jersey, came out to my parents, had my heart broken, started a job in Hopewell, NJ, started a second part-time job at Barnes & Noble, moved to Princeton, NJ, rang in the new millennium, had a shitty roommate, moved in with a friend, studied for and passed the New Jersey Bar Exam, moved to Jersey City to work as a law clerk in Newark, had my heart broken again, started a blog, got a job as a lawyer, moved to another apartment in Jersey City, wrote a screenplay, did lots of dating, had my heart broken again, joined a chorus, met Matt and entered a long-term relationship, moved to Manhattan, got laid off, saw my brother get married, got a new job, moved twice more. And read lots of books and saw lots of movies and theater and TV.
It’s only lately that it feels like a long period of time has passed since 1999. Often in the past 10 years, I’ve felt like I’ve been living in post-Virginia time. (Virginia is where I spent most of the ’90s.) I’ve felt like I’m post-something and pre-something else, instead of in the midst of something. I feel like I’ve drifted through my life for the last 10 years and haven’t accomplished anything, and that I’ve been waiting for the next phase of my life to start.
The time is just slipping through my fingers like sand. I worry that several more 10-year chunks will pass, and one day I’ll wake up a decrepit old man with nothing to show for all the time that has gone by.
Met Matt and entered a long-term relationship… You didn’t say Met Matt and fell in love… Why not?
Jenry
Oh definitely fell in love… that was implied. :)
“Long-term relationship” does not necessarily imply “falling in love.”
Awww. But you have the most important thing to show for it. You have love. The rest is just details. Right?
As I rapidly approach my 30th birthday, I certainly sympathize your feelings on the passage of time.
I too kind of regret that I haven’t accomplished anything so far in my life, but then I have to think about what that means. What is an “accomplishment?” We can’t all be Shakespeares, Napoleons, or Einsteins. I think it’s an accomplishment enough if we can go through each day, causing as little harm as we can in our passing, and trying to do at least one kind thing for someone else, one thing however minor to try to make our own little corner of the world a better place.
That’s all we really can do, just live each day as it comes. If we spend too much time worrying about the past or the future, we lose out on the present. So, if my opinion counts for anything, I think you’re doing a very good job strutting and fretting your hour upon the stage. :)
Ok good, because you both seem like wonderful people (from what I can tell by reading your blogs… well who really knows, but you portray being wonderful people :)) and who would want to go through the motions of a long term relationhip without there being love. :)
Jenry
Ohh and the spelling is off because I am Canadian… yeah we will blame that :P
Jenry