It’s great that we got bin Laden. It certainly feels momentous. But I can’t help but feel that it’s an emotional victory more than anything else. Isn’t al Qaeda a big organization? Was bin Laden even really running it anymore? Hadn’t everyone been saying in the last few years that capturing or killing bin Laden wouldn’t really make a big difference in the “war on terror” anymore?

I turned on the TV last night and saw the boisterous, jubilant crowds cheering in front of the White House and at Ground Zero. At first it felt exhilarating to see them. But it quickly began to seem unsettling, and… I don’t know… tacky?

On the one hand, I can’t really fault people for wanting to celebrate. It’s entirely possible for people to understand that this isn’t necessarily as big a deal as it seems but to still want to go out there and cheer. It’s not my place to tell other people how they should act and what they should think.

But on the other hand, here’s how I feel: what are these stupid college kids whooping about? It’s great and all, but it’s not like we got Hitler. It’s not like we’ve been fighting a conventional war against a concrete enemy that has suddenly come to an end. It’s not like this is a video game where we’ve killed the arch villain. It’s not like this really changes much. I understand that these kids were in elementary or middle school on 9/11, and I understand that the earlier in your life that an event occurs, the bigger an impression it makes, and I understand that 10 years to a college student is much longer than 10 years to an adult. But all the celebration just seemed naive.

Maybe it’s just me. I’m not really comfortable with loud crowds engaged in whooping, rowdy displays of testosterone. It made me think of all the times I’ve ridden on NJ Transit when the train is filled with New York Rangers fans on the way to a game at MSG, wearing their talismanic hockey jerseys.

But I have to admit, I had my own less-than-rational thoughts when I saw the news: I felt good for Obama. See that, you fucking Republicans? A Democratic president did this. Democrats have balls, too. Tell me again that Barack Obama hates America, you fucktards.

Was it good to feel that way? Was it right to feel that way? Was it generous to feel that way? Not necessarily. Part of me wishes bin Laden was captured alive so that he could spend the rest of his life rotting away in solitary confinement. And no matter how much evil a person has done, it seems wrong to cheer a death.

But like those whooping college students, I too am human, and you can’t control the first thoughts that come into your head.

This isn’t a victory or the end of a war, and it’s not as important as some people think it is. But it’s still a big deal psychologically.

It does have meaning.